7 things my girlfriend's dog constantly reminds me about life
Nearly every day in the summer, I take my dog to Westmoreland Park, where she plays in the creek. She runs up and down through the creek bed, diving headlong into the water, chasing ducks. Sometimes when I watch her I think about how good life can be, if we only lose ourselves in our stories. Lucy doesn’t read self-help books about how to be a dog; she just is a dog. All she wants to do is chase ducks and sticks and do other things that make both her and me happy. It makes me wonder if that was the intention for man, to chase sticks and ducks, to name animals, to create families, and to keep looking back at God to feed off his pleasure at our pleasure. It’s interesting that in the Bible, in the book of Ecclesiastes, the only practical advice given about living a meaningful life is to find a job you like, enjoy your marriage, and obey God. It’s as though God is saying, Write a good story, take somebody with you, and let me help. - Donald Miller
Simple. This is how Hercules' life is. No aspirations, to anxieties - just being.
My girlfriend has a dog. I don't like to admit it, but i've grown quite fond of this creature. Don't get more wrong, I still disagree with how much we pretend the dog is a tiny human as opposed to the beast it no doubts would otherwise be. BUT I do endulge, emberrasingly enough for what's meant to be my human higher-intellect, in admiring his approach to life.
Here are some lessons he reminds me of.
You should bark, and bark again, but take none of it to heart
I'm in the study, he's just outside my door and can't get in through the crack. I don't move.
He looks at me through the crack that's not wide enough for him to muster enough courage to get through. He wants me to open the door. He stares. He waits.
He lets out a bark - a quiet, shy bark.
Waits some more. 30 seconds later, another one.
By the 3rd minutes of this stand off, the nuisance of listening to the barks becomes more annoying than getting up to open the door another time.
He comes in triumphantly, as if nothing has happened. Circles me. Tries to jump into my lap, fails a few times (he has some "junk in the trunk"). Settles in a corner for a whooping 5 minutes. He hears something outside. He gets up excited, he lets out his first bark to get out.
Rinse and repeat.
Takeaway: you and I already know that chasers and follow-ups work. But, if you're like me, more often than not we get frustrated with the people that repeatedly are less responsive that we'd like them to be. Let's be more like Hercules - let things go as soon as things happen.
There's no shame is showing your belly if you've gone too far
As we've established, Hercules is really cute but sometimes he really gets on your nerves.
In those rare cases, when you tell him off he looks at you, and rolls onto his back to show you his belly. How could you be angry with someone who's so wholeheartedly apologising?
Everyone rushes towards him with compassion and pets. I hold back, to reinforce that his apology was justified (but in my heart, I'm also no more immune to his tricks than everyone else).
Takeaway: just apologise sincerely if things don't go well. Even when it's not fully your fault, you can still express your regret that everything isn't the way you hoped. It helps. It disarms anger. It reminds people of their humanity.
Play is a daily necessity
At varoius points during the day, without prompted or provoked, Hercules will randomly get up, stretch and start pushing himself into things.
He'll most likely start by pushing his head against the floor. Perhaps he'll continue with a bark. If that doesn't work, he'll start rolling around/ into you.
Eventually, if we really DON'T GET IT, he'll bet under the couch cover - this is a sure way of forcing us to stop whever we're doing and just play with him.
And you have to play with him, because it's immediately rewarding. It's such a beautifully mindful presence - uncomplicated and grounding.
Takeaway: initiate play, even when people are reluktant to join the fun. They'll most likely come around as soon as the pay-off begins. Engage in mindless games randomly and without cause - perhaps next time you wait for the bus or are stuck in a traffic jam. Make this world a game, for your benefit and for the benefit of the grumps around you.
Every journey is an adventure worthy of getting excited for
There are few triggers that Hercules will immediately react to.
"Walk" is one of the most potent ones.
He looks up sharply as soon as he hears this. He tilts his head if you repeat the good news, as if he can't quite believe the amazing experience about to come up.
His step is joyful and full of energy (even if you announce it at 10pm at night). He walks up to his harness, which he proudly accepts. He moves around you with anticipation and in a hope to speed this up.
There are very few walks we take him on (I don't mean in fequency, I mean few in variety), yet every single time it's as if an adventure unique to this present moment is sure to unfold.
It never does. The streets, alleys, and no doubt the smells are always similar.
But the enthusiasm for this is always so strong! Perhaps it's the eyes of the beholder (or his short memory).
Takeaway: rediscover the excitment of the mondane. Most likely, there are so many things in life to be excited about and content with - only trouble is those don't stick out as much as the things that fail. Make a conscious effort at first to shift your focus - after all, happiness is a product of subjective focus (rarely objective circumstance). Explore the world like Proust describes it, with fresh, child-like (or dog-like...) eyes - you might be surprise how much color you begin to resolve.
Every dawn is bursting with opportunity, so no need to hold back
Hercules loves mornings. As soon as he detects any movement, he gets up and waits patiently or impatiently by the side of the bed.
If you don't get up in what he considers a reasonable time, he'll try and pry you away from the bed with a gentle sound.
If you get up but walk by him, he'll jump at you and run into your feet offended. It's as if you're robbing him of one of his favioute moments.
If you give him attention (the only viable option, really), he'll nessle into you, lick your arms, feet, squirm around, roll over in delight for quite a few minutes.
He loves it. He enjoys it so much when he's reunited with his favourite humans after such a long but restful sleep.
Takeaway: greet the universe every morning with your full attention and optimism. It does change the way you view things and the way things shape up. Give the world the benefit of the doubt - it may just surprise you in a positive way.
Every excess is a burdeon - less can be more
Hercules has a tiny stomach, but my grilfriend's parents sometimes forget this. He will often get much more food than he can cope with.
But he's a big fan of food, so he'll do his damn best to push all of it down his throat. Sometimes that's not enough, so there'll be food left in his bowl.
If this happens, the abundance ends up ruining his day.
The thought of the other dogs (i.e. HIS BEST FRIENDS) getting it torments him. He will sit for hours next to his food, guarding it to make sure nobody else comes close. Even though, during that time he'd rather chill or play.
From a jolly time, running and playing with the other dogs, his attention shifts on protecting the wealth he has accumulated. He'll gurad it, even though he'd much rather prefer to run around and relax. Remember that he has no need of this - his stomach is really full and he never goes hungry. But the more he has, the less he enjoys himself.
He always looks relieved when we take the food away from him, so he can resume his relationship with all the other dogs.
Takeaway: the Biblical intuition on how wealth is a burden on the soul has never been more vivid to me. It's good to stay light - just heavy enough to be nourished, but not too heavy to move with ease.
Being who you're meant to be doesn't require a manual
Hercules is not torn apart at any point during his day. He known what he wants, be it food, rest, affection, play, chasing.
His existance is uncomplicated.
Takeaway: sure, our lives are nowhere near as devoid of conflict and/ or agency - both internal and external. But perhaps, it's useful to seek ways of exiting the rollercoaster and luxuriate in the odd moment of stillness, quitness, and contemplation. Just like Hercules, let's try to increase the moments where we look around, smile, and genuinely feel like every atom in the universe is exactly where it's meant to be.
This is something that i thought deeply about after finishing Miller's book from which I took the starting quote of this article. Perhaps one core point of being here is not to make the world more efficient or to push buttons in seeking control and order. Perhaps part of it is taking it in. Really taking it in.
